Other Places

Miscellaneous Comments

1. Hentai manga is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
2. Q: Hey bitch, why didn't you break up the long-ass Akihabara section?
   A: Fuck you, punk. Just because you need pre-digested chunks of my genius to comprehend it doesn't mean it's gonna happen. If I broke it up into shorter sections, your simple ass would never understand the directions as a whole. That means you'd still bitch at me.
3. Q: Why isn't your site more professional?
   A: Jesus Christ, I give you my time and effort for free, and you still fucking want more. If you don't like it, fuck off.
4. Q: You seem bitter and testy.
   A: Fuck you, fuck you very much.
5. Some people say that if you're visiting Japan, it's a waste of a trip if you just shop for anime. I've thought about it, and my opinion is fuck'em. If you have the luxury of time and money, and visiting Japan just to go shopping gives you pleasure, more power to you. Humans are hardly logical creatures, and if you're not interested in the other aspects of Japan you'll just end up being bored.
6. This may be the last year or so of the laserdisc. Liberty still carries about the same amount of LDs as last year, but other places are either phasing them out or got rid of them entirely. If you want to buy, now may be the time.
7. Pornography is the third leg of the Iron Triangle: anime/manga/porn. Based on my completely biased and unscientific observations, I'd say manga is the biggest seller, followed by porn, and then anime. Why do I say this? Because the amount of people I see in an anime store does not even compare to the amount of people I see in a hentai manga/doujinshi store. Until you see, you will not believe. Even if you see and still not believe, then fuck you.
8. After being in enough anime stores and noticing the prevalence of porn in one form or another, I firmly believe that there is a strong correlation between anime fans and perverts.
9. Hentai manga is the greatest thing since sliced bread. Sure, doujinshi gets you a couple characters from a series you like engaged in a group orgy, but hentai manga gives you more pages for the buck.
10. There is nothing quite like spending a day shopping solely at porn stores. It's an almost calming, transcendental experience.
11. There is nothing quite like rummaging through a porn store and buying a dozen volumes of hentai manga at once. Just holding that bag full of porn is like, like... victory.
12. Observant deviants will note that there are not pictures for every store. The reason for this is that I was either too fucking lazy to take the picture, or I simply fucked up and forgot. My bad, seriously.
13. You will notice that there are no maps with this guide. That is because I am too lazy to draw them. If you really need a map, then I would recommend a great book called:
    

    Tokyo Kouryaku Mappu 2000
    (The Best Shops Of Tokyo Captured 2000)
    Publisher: Mediaworks
    ISBN 4-8402-1606-1
    Price 1100 yen
    

    This book is the bombazza, and was extremely handy when I was wandering around the other sections of Tokyo (thanks for giving me the '96 version, Lee!). It has maps of anime and manga stores in each of the various sections of Tokyo like Akihabara, Shinjuku, Ikebukuro, and others. It is in Japanese, however, and you would probably have to go through a bookstore like Kinokuniya to order it. At this point, some of the more deviant-minded readers may wonder why I just don't scan the maps from this book. The answer is: I want the people who put this book together to get paid. They deserve mad props and scrilla for their work, and I ain't gonna take either away from them.

14. Hentai manga is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
15. Bags of LDs can get quite heavy, and if you're using the ones with the cord handles that Liberty provides, they can really dig into your hands. After you've bought a bunch of LDs and find you still want to walk around, there are lockers you can use at the train station. They range from 300-800 yen depending on the locker size, and only take 100 yen coins. Better yet, bring along a friend with a backpack big enough to fit LDs, and feed his ass at McDonald's as payment for hauling the shit up the 45-degree incline hill on the way home.
16. If you plan to shop for a wide variety of shit, try to consolidate and look for stuff only in one format (especially when you're shopping in Akihabara). So, if today you're shopping for laserdiscs, don't shop for hentai manga. Speaking as a professional in this area, it's damn difficult to shop for both laserdiscs and hentai manga at the same time.
17. It's not only difficult to shop for different media on the same day, but spending that much money for stuff doesn't leave much for shopping on other days (especially if you're unlucky enough to be on a budget.)
18. Snobby American time: Asian-style toilets suck ass. I cannot fathom this squatting over a porcelain hole in the ground. I need something to rest my ass on while I relax my bowels.
    
    The face of evil
    

    If you are a snobby American like me, find out where a Western-style toilet is and remember that location. In Akihabara, I know of two places:
    

    When you exit the ticket gate at the train station, head straight into the next building. There'll be a food court/department store, and in the middle a set of stores. Take them to the second floor. Near the stairs there'll be a Men's room that has the kind of toilet we all know and love.
    *Relief*
    The other place is Yamagiwa department store. They have Western-style toilets on almost every floor.
    *Relief*
    

    In general, major department stores and fast-food chains like McDonald's will have Western-style toilets. However, the ones in McDonald's are usually cramped as fuck. While I'm on the subject of McDonald's, I'd like to espouse this theory I have about them and train stations:
    

    The McDonald's Spawn Theory
    The likelihood of there being a McDonald's within a 5-block radius of a JR station increases exponentially if the JR station has more than two sets of railroad tracks.
    

19. Hentai manga is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
20. A lot of stores are beginning to accept credit cards, which is a Godsend for those of us who live on credit. Most of them, however, require you to spend a fair amount before you can charge it. Also, before you leave for Japan you should check with your credit card company to make sure that the Japanese stores won't have any problems with your foreign-issued card.
21. Most ATMs in Japan will not accept a foreign-issued card, period. There are a few that are especially set up to accept them, but the damn machines keep moving around (at least in my experience). My best advice is to try to find a tourist information center in whatever area you're visiting. They should be able to direct you to an ATM that'll accept your foreign credit card.
22. After you charge a couple hundred bucks worth of shit on your card, do not be suprised if your card starts getting declined. This is because the fucks who process the credit card transactions do not operate in a timely manner. From what I understand, the store clerks could theoretically call the processing company and get the shit cleared, but the bitches don't want to deal with the hassle. This shit happens with an entire credit card company, so if you get declined on one Visa card, you'll get declined on your other Visa card. One workaround: bring both a Visa and a Mastercard. Another possibility (Cheap Bastard pussied out and never tried this): go into "Hyper-Belligerent American Mode"(TM) and demand that the cashiers call the phone number printed on the credit slip to clear the charge.
23. The Japanese are beautiful people when it comes to being discreet. Where else can you shop at a pone store, and the clerk asks if you want a cover sleeve for your hentai manga?
24. Stores that sell used anime like Liberty and the U-Shop will usually have a sticker on the anime denoting the condition its in. These are ranked as A, A', B, & C. This gives you an idea of the physical condition of the laserdisc/DVD/videocassette and the cover (e.g. scratches, tears, etc.). They do not, however, cover the actual quality of the video. So for those discs that have been known to suffer from laserrot, such as Video Girl Ai Vol. 2, be advised. Also, there is the risk of buying a disc with noise. However, out of the couple of hundred LDs I've purchased in Japan (most of them used), only two ever had noise. So usually that is not a problem.

25. Certain stores such as K-Books, Yamagiwa Soft, and Spot have frequent buyer cards. Basically, for every given amount you spend you get a point. After spending an obscene amount of money you have enough points to get a piddly discount on your next purchase. Whoopty-fucking-do. What is cool, however, is when the store gives you a present after getting enough points. K-Books, for example, will give you a special telephone card. The usually have several to choose from, even a few hentai ones. (See, no matter what we're talking about, the porn will still come into play.)

26. The store clerks will not always inquire if the barbarian dog has or wants a point card. In this case, ask for the point card. Sure, you say you're never gonna come back and spend that much money. Cheap Bastard said that too, and history proved him wrong. That's why Cheap Bastard now asks for a point card whenever it's available.
27. Reading Japanese: If you're shopping for laserdiscs, then at least learn to read hiragana and katakana. The LDs are sorted in Japanese alphabetical order from "a" to "wa." I ain't hunting for your LDs next time, Jin.
28. Given that banks are closed on Saturdays and Sundays, make sure you have enough cash to make it through the weekend. Not having enough yen can put a real crimp in your shopping plans.
29. We talk about comic porn for women, but when you stop to think about it, yaoi doesn't necessarily mean porn. I guess that's slash. (I dunno, I've never read either.) Anyhow, to any women who think I paint the brush of porn over yaoi unfairly, I sincerely apologize. However, I sincerely hope that most of it is porn, as porn is... you guessed it: the greatest thing since sliced bread.
30. Speaking of womens' doujinshi, the male mind begins to wonder... how much of womens' doujinshi is porn? More importantly, do women use comic porn for the same purposes as men? God bless'em if they do.
31. Combini-catcher addiction is a terrible thing to behold. You put 100 yen in the machine, and grab the toy on the first try. However, the toy slips at the last minute, and you think "Man, I almost had it." You then proceed to stick another 100 yen in the machine, and that's when you're hooked. Next thing you know, you've put $30 in the damn machine because you have to have that Chun Li figurine, as Chun Li is the epitome of Cheap Bastard's ideal woman (strong, smart, and based on reading many doujinshi about her, a total sex fiend). However, that is not as disturbing as one person (whom we shall call "V-kun") who looked at a machine that had fishing rods and thought, "I can win that." So he actually wins a fishing rod on the first try, and then begins to wonder, "What the hell was I thinking? What the fuck am I gonna do with a fishing rod? I don't fish!" Should we even go into the time he spent 2000 yen on a failed attempt to win a NeoGeo Pocket he could have bought for 3000 yen? Oh, the humanity...
32. Hentai manga is the greatest thing since sliced bread.
33. This credit card thing has been verified to be bullshit. V-kun got declined one time at Liberty, and the clerk actually picked up the phone and called Nicos. 10 minutes later, V-kun walks out with his shit, all paid for by credit card. Now you know kiddies, if that shit gets declined, make the fuckers' call the number. (Yes Verge, you get props for not pussying out.)
34. The Japanese shopping guide for 2001 year turned out to only focus on Akihabara. Apparently, that is where the shopping shiznit is at for most people. Yeah, I know this particular comment is way late, but for peeps who want the info it's:
    

    Akihabara Kouryaku Handbook 2001
    Publisher: Mediaworks
    ISBN 4-8402-1792-0
    Price 1300 yen
    

35. McDonald's meals are known as "sets". If you want to "super size" your meal, it's referred as an "L-set". If you want a Happy Meal, it's known as a "Happy Set". Just so you know you aren't completely mad when you hear the start of a commercial with the words "Happy Set" being sung.
36. Comment from the peanut gallery: combini-catcher addiction is basically a gambling addiction, because when you spend 2000 yen on getting a 500 yen Initial-D keychain and you actually win it, it'll make you think you're talented enough to get other items using less yen. But without the free alcohol and cocktail waitresses. (Yeah "V-kun," and we know you can quit anytime you want...)
37. Airsoft is addicting. Do you know how many LDs and DVDs you can buy with $250?
38. Hentai manga is more than just great literature, it's a way of life.

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